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brettybo
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Name: Brett
Location: Charlotte, North Carolina, United States
Interests: worshiping and glorifying Jesus Christ, playing guitar, playing soccer, hanging out with friends, photography, doing wacko stuph, being the oh so cool person that i am, listening to post hardcore music, talking talking in weird accents, talking on the celular, making music videos, making short films, when i see alot of birds in a parking lot i enjoy running up to them flapping my arms and making weird noises to make them fly around, acting, singing, playing drums, playing the kazoo (that is fun), etc
Expertise: being me. i think i'd be an expert in that area
Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:  callxmexbrett
Member Since:
7/25/2004
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| I think a blog is like a journal, but public. i think it's something that can contain all of my hopes, fears, goals, thoughts, loves, hates and so on so forth. the crazy thing about it all is that it's completely public. anyone can see it. so if i wanted to explain how i wanted to destroy the world on this blog, i could. and it's quite possible that i would get in trouble for such a thing because anyone could read my thoughts and figure out who i am. i'd say a blog is a way into someone's mind. but can you read something and figure out who someone is?
is that possible? for someone to figure out who someone is by just reading a blog? maybe someone who updates their blog frequently. but me? i dont know. and im not here to figure that out. it might be possible though. i guess you could go back and read all my entry's from the years past when i actually posted these blog entry's and kinda get a clue about who i was back then. but now, not so much.
i dont really know what im getting at here, so be patient with me.
im a twenty year old dude. i've got my pro's and con's. but i'm like any other twenty year old guy. i guess going through the twenty year old motions of life. i like life. i love life. i really do. but you know, there's people in life that try to drag you down. and in these twenty years, i've always tried to push away the ones who drag me down. but recently i've been living differently. i've tried to give everyone a chance. i do try, rather. i like to listen to people. i like to help people. i think that's what God wanted me to do here on earth. listen and help. through high school, when i had friends (HA!), they would talk to me about the wildest things. such as their relationships. with boys, girls, dads, moms, etc. they'd talk about good things, and bad. and with whatever it was that they talked about, i would help them. i would do my best to make the bad good. and even help them understand it all.
to a point, i still feel like i am that same guy, yet im so different. the same guy that listens, but also, i want so have someone that listens. i really do like being the fella that people go to and talk to about their problems. i want to fix things. i want everyone to be happy, joyful, and filled with peace. i've kinda always been that way, until recently. you know, the one who fixes problems. well now, i need someone to help fix mine and i find myself lost. no friends to talk to, no more happyness, and alot of over thinking. it's hard to be the listener, the one who helps others, when i need my own listener. i need someone to talk to. but not just someone. i want someone who cares. alot of people in this day and age dont give a crap about other people. most people are selfish and want everything to themselves. and if things dont go their way, they lash out in an irrational manner. i hope that's word, cause i just used it.
i still have no idea what im trying to say here. so once again, bare with me.
im not happy anymore. i've lost touch with alot of friends. i've lost touch with alot of friends from church. those where the ones i held dearest to my heart. cause out of all of the friends i had, the ones from church seemed to be the ones who at least tried to care. they gave an effort to listen. but their gone. i used to love playing show's with the band. i would talk to those guys all the time. whatever the situation might have been. they were there to pick me up. i feel like now, being a twenty year old guy, at this point in my life, at no ones fault buy my own, i have no one.
i like to think. it's what i do best :) i'm always thinking of things i should do to make life better. im always thinking of things i can do to make my relationships better. and also things that i can do to make my God happy with me and what im doing for Him. He's the one that's always there for me. He's the best listener of them all. but unfortunately, he wont talk back. God has used me in many ways in these twenty years. He's spoken through me to other people, he's taught me things through other people, but i dont think He's actually spoken directly at me. or maybe i wasnt listening. i want to hear Him. i really do. but maybe my thinking drowns out eveyother thing going on around me.
I'm not a perfect human and i dont expect anyone to expect that out of me. just like i dont expect anyone to be perfect. so i guess that's one of my con's. i'm not perfect. i try to be. i try to be the coolest, nicest, most fun loving guy out there. i want people to be happy when they're around me. i dont know if they are, but i do try.
i used to play in a band. we were a Christian rock band. we lasted about a year. it was one of the greatest times of my life. i loved it. i found so much joy in it. i love music. i love listening to music and even being critical about the bands i listen to. i'll tell myself "the way the drummer played that fill was great!" or "i would have expected something that sounded better from these guys." i love music. i love listening to the instruments. i hardly ever listen to the words in a song. i like to listen to what makes the words sound good. i like to sing. i like to sing alot. i wish i could just start a new band right now and i guess make it a one man band. the drummer from underoath did that. he started the band called the almost. he recorded every single instrument and sung on that first album. that's awesome. i wish i could do that. i wish i had the patience to do that. i can make lyrics though. i cant make guitar riffs and strumming patterns. or maybe that's just a lack of self confidence.
i have no self confidence and that's one of my biggest problems. i think i'm horrible at everything. i dont like who i am sometimes. i tell myself, nah you cant do that so dont even try. like trying to start a band. i want to play in a band so badly. but i dont think im good enough for something like that. or anything for that matter.
my fingers are getting tired.
i love life. life is great and is worth living. never will i ever concider suicide. it can never get that bad. sure it can get rough at times. but life is great. and with God on your side, life is even greater. God is great and God is good. without Him, i'd be nothing. i'd be no where. but He has helped me through this struggle, just like i trust that he will continue to help me. this is just a page in this book of life. i know one day i'll be happy again. whether it means some people will come back into my life and others will be taken out or whatever. i know He will get me through all of this. i'll be on the other side of the bridge where the green grass grows and i will love it. but right now, i'm still trying to find my way there.
whoever may be out there reading this, pray for me i beg of you. i need God's guidence. i need wisdom and knowledge. i know he can give it to me. and if i put enough faith and trust in Him, i will get it. so people, pray for me. please
so i guess this is a blog. maybe this is my means of venting. of getting it all out in the open. off of my chest. maybe it will work, maybe it wont. but it's out there. for the world to see. i know i dont have the greatest grammar or the best spelling in the world, but i try. and that's what's important right? i dont know. and i'm not here to figure that out.
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| well hello everyone. it's been a long time since i've been on here. it's probably every 2 months i log on and look at things, then log back off. dont really know what to put on here anymore. but here i go. im gonna try to do this again. and probably not for a few more months too.
well, i now work in construction as an electrician. they are putting me through 4 years of school for free to get my journeyman electricians license. it pays well and i work monday - friday 7-3:30. it sounds great. but it's still a wonder if this is what i want to do. or rather what God wants me to do. but for now, i have chosen, whether i like the job or not, that i need to be thankful to God cause he has provided me with a means of providing for myself. that's something to be thankful for.
i went fishing yesterday at cain creek park. i caught absolutely nothing. i even went out and got a fishing license and everything. and i caught nothing. at first the dumb rod and fishing line got a tied up together and that frustrated me. but then i calmed down and christy and i had a good time.
uh... i dont know what else to say.
k well, i guess that's it.
give me comments so i know ive still got it. :D
Brett
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| Sorry Xanga... I have cheated on you with Myspace and Facebook.
Look me up on both of them, friends!
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| I want to be in a RAWK and roll band. Who wants to be in a RAWK and roll band with me? | | |
| I saw Maylene and the Sons of Disaster and Haste the Day on tuesday night. what an amazing show. maylene was so gooooood. ive never enjoyed a show so much. haste the day did great too. but i loved maylene's show. it was my favorite show. ive ever seen. ever. 
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